Gratitude and Wellbeing 

There are so many scientific studies that show us how feeling gratitude is good for our mental health and wellbeing. But when life is full of difficulties, maintaining feelings of gratitude can be genuinely quite difficult. 

But remember, feeling gratitude is not about dismissing your other feelings, or accepting injustice. It is about noticing and giving your attention to the things in your life that inspire positive feelings. 

Gratitude can help us feel acceptance with our situation. By focusing on what we have, rather than what we don’t have, or wish we had, we can stop ourselves from getting swept up in longing or regret. 

Gratitude is a life skill 

Science shows that being grateful actually makes us happier. In the long-term it can shape our life decisions, relationships, physical health, and mental wellbeing – it really life-changing. And the good news is – it’s free and anyone can access it! 

We all know how to be grateful instinctively – but it is a skill, and like all skills, we can practice to get even better. 

Think about how some people are always complaining about something. While other people are always hopeful and optimistic. Both types of people experience the same ups and downs, but they have developed different habits when it comes to what they consider worth most of their focus and attention. 

It is not wrong or ungrateful to feel sad, anger, worried, or any other emotion. 

If you’re going through a difficult time you don’t have to force yourself to ignore your feelings because ‘other people have it worse.’ Being grateful just means being able to appreciate and enjoy your blessings, regardless of your situation, even if you are going through many other difficult emotions at the same time. 


While gratitude can help when you’re going through a tough time, it is important to get the support you need from others and not to suffer in silence. 

Find what works for you 

Some people like to make special time in their day to focus on feelings of gratitude. Many people like to do this through prayer, while others enjoy gratitude meditations, journaling or some other ritual that offers them a peaceful few moments to reflect and feel good. Not everything will feel right for everyone, and that’s ok. (Remember, it’s not just about thinking about gratitude or why we should be grateful, but genuinely feeling the feeling!) 

No matter what you are going through – finding ways to meaningfully and sincerely increase your gratitude practice will have a positive effect on your feelings of peace and contentment. So it’s definitely worth investing a little time and research into what works for you. 


Three Keys of Gratitude to Unlock Your Happiest Life

The gratitude experiment 

How gratitude changes your brain

The healing power of gratitude: change your brain 


Gratitude and mental health  

Guide to dhikr and meditation 

Solving the gratitude equation: Qur’an 14:7


Find your true self when you feel lost – Gabor Mate Video 

How to find work you love 

What makes us feel good about our work? 

3 ways to connect better with your coworkers 

4 tips to future proof your work 

How to succeed in your new job 

How diversity makes teams more innovative 

3 lessons on success from an arab business woman 

How rest can make you better at your job 

How to build a freelance career that works for you 

5 steps to building a personal brand you feel good about 

The unexpected key to boosting your productivity 

Tony Robbins 

Feeling good about your id

Emma Seppälä, PhD, is a faculty member at the Yale School of Management, faculty director of the Yale School of Management’s Women’s Leadership Program and bestselling author of SOVEREIGN (2024) and The Happiness Track (2017). She is also science director of Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. Follow her work at, or on Instagram.


Nicole K. McNichols Ph.D. is an Associate Teaching Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Washington where she teaches courses about sex and relationship science in addition to industrial and organizational psychology. Follow her work at and on Instagram.

What to do when you’re feeling stuck

Have you ever felt trapped or hopeless? Like life is going nowhere and you’re stuck, unable to change your circumstances? You are not alone. 


Life is full of situations and circumstances we cannot control, which can make us feel powerless and depressed. If you feel this way, it’s ok, there are things you can do that will help you feel better and get you on track to living the life you desire. It might take a little bit of effort, but it will be worth it. 


Write down your goals 


Write a list of everything you want to accomplish in life – big and small. Have fun with it! This list is just for you! Having an idea of what you are aiming for helps you to take meaningful steps in the right direction. Studies show that people who actually write down their goals are more likely to achieve them. 


Set small daily/weekly goals 


When you feel stuck it can be hard to feel motivated to do anything at all. That’s ok. One small step at a time. Set yourself little challenges – it could be as small as: wake up on time every day, or tidy the bed first thing in the morning. And celebrate when you achieve these goals! You will start to feel a sense of accomplishment and purpose in your week. 


Keep a journal  


It’s amazing how much we go through without giving ourselves a chance to process our feelings. Spending 10 mins before bed every day writing out your thoughts, feelings and experiences can help you release stored up emotions. It can also help you track your mood, patterns, and spot areas of your life that are going well as well as things you’d like to improve.  


Invest in self-care 


Whether it’s exercising or making time for enjoyable activities – you are worth it. Just because life isn’t going in the direction you hoped it would, doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to enjoy it. Never put your happiness on pause – live your life now. 


Start doing “inner-work” 


Very often, feeling stuck is a psychological response caused by fears, insecurities and unhealed pain. And the good thing is, that means things can change – it just requires us to confront our current way of thinking about the world. Usually people will do this with the help of some kind of therapist, but if that is unrealistic for you don’t worry. There are lots of free online resources that can help you on your journey – check out the list below as a starting point. 


Proactively seek out content which inspires you 


It’s hard to dream of a better future when you don’t have strong examples of what a better future could look like, and people who have made it. It’s time to watch inspiring YouTube videos from life coaches, motivational speakers, therapists, successful business owners, and people who started life in difficult circumstances and found a way out. You could also try to find inspiration from the stories of people who are currently in your dream job and learn how they got there. It’s easy to think, “well they got lucky”, or “they don’t have to face the same barriers and challenges as I do”, and that could be true – but there are still important lessons you can learn which will help you on your journey. 


Find people who motivate you


Some people love being negative. These people are always quick to point out why something won’t work, or why it is bad or why life is so unfair. They might even love to gossip and enjoy it when others fail. And these people are holding you back! Reduce the time you spend with energy-draining people. Find people who do the opposite. 


Optimism and positivity are necessary ingredients for success – ask any successful person! If you try, you might fail – once, twice, three times – but eventually you will succeed. But if you never try, you will never change things. That’s why you need people around you who encourage and support you, even when you’re doubting yourself. Being around positive people is very helpful – and if you can’t find them in real life, look online! 


Be open to saying ‘yes’ more 


Feeling stuck can also make us think: what is the point? You can feel low energy, and very tired from the daily routine of life, making you less able to spot opportunities when they come along. Saying yes to new experiences can be life-changing. 


Change your routine 


Shake things up. Move your room around. Try waking up at a different time. Go to a different lunch spot. Go to the gym on a different day. Turn your phone off for a day. Explore different shops. If life feels boring – even little things can disrupt your usual thought-processes and expose you to new people, places and perspectives.

Get creative 


Poetry. Stories. Drawing. Doodling. Singing. Playing an instrument. Designing. Making a moodboard from magazine cuttings. Editing photos. Do something to unleash your creativity. 


Videos to watch: 


  1. Why feeling stuck is the sign of a breakthrough 
  2. How to motivate yourself to change your behaviour 
  3. Find your true self when you feel lost 
  4. You don’t find happiness – you create it 
  5. Freedom from self-doubt 
  6. Why we’re unhappy – the expectation gap 
  7. Don’t believe everything you think 
  8. Self-worth the key to overcoming procrastination
  9. The unexpected key to boosting your productivity 
  10. Jay Shetty’s YouTube channel – inspiring conversations from people around the world on inner-peace, life, mental health, finding success and more





Dealing with rejection

We all face rejection at some point – it is a part of life. Whether we are rejected for our dream job, or by a romantic partner – rejection can be painful. But there are things we can do to feel better and turn our situation around. Here are some of our top tips: 

It’s ok to feel your feelings 

Don’t let people tell you not to be upset. You are allowed to feel how you feel! Having feelings of sadness, anger, frustration, confusion, disappointment etc is normal. So give yourself the time you need to feel better. It can really help to talk about your feelings with someone you trust.


Ask for feedback 


One of the biggest frustrations about being rejected is when it is unclear why we are being rejected. But we don’t have to live with the mystery – you can politely ask for feedback. This can be scary because it is never nice being told why someone did not think you were good enough, but without this data how will you know what to improve? 

Asking for feedback is also very helpful because sometimes it’s easy to imagine things that are simply not true. The reason you were rejected and the reason you think you were rejected could easily be completely different! 


Choose a positive perspective 


We don’t always get to choose what happens in life, but we can choose our attitude. Rejection is a form of redirection. Perhaps you really wanted something, but there is an even better opportunity waiting for you around the corner. Maybe you needed the rejection to teach you something important that will help you get to your next step.  


Think about when you had an argument with a friend at school. It probably felt like a big deal. But now, years later you hardly remember it, even though at the time it felt like the worst thing in the world. Rejection is like this. It stings for a while, but life moves on. 




Acceptance is crucial. Ask yourself: will wasting time regretting things help you move forward? If not, then give yourself permission to let go of the past. The more you give yourself permission to focus on the positives, the faster you will bounce back from the rejection. You are allowed to believe someone made the wrong decision, but they are allowed to make their own decisions and your job is not to convince them.  


Work on self-love and self-esteem 


Don’t let rejection define you. No one else has the power to decide your value, but you. You are a unique, talented, kind and loveable human being with so much love to give this world. No one else in the world can be like you, because no one else in the world is you! Your story, your journey and your experiences are one of a kind. And that’s beautiful and worth celebrating. So remember, you deserve to be around people who value you and want to be around you. If people don’t want you, that’s their loss. You are not for everyone, and everyone is not for you. The rejection we all face just helps us all get further in our journey to find the people, jobs and places where we will thrive the best.

Helpful videos:


  1. How to deal with a job rejection
  2. 5 steps to dealing with rejection from a job interview 
  3. How to deal with rejection 
  4. The benefits of rejection 
  5. Getting stuck in the negatives (and how to get unstuck) 
  6. The skill of self-confidence 
  7. How to eliminate self-doubt forever 
  8. If you want to achieve your goals don’t focus on them 
  9. Changing Perspective from Shame to Self-worth



Building feelings of self-love 

My spiritual health-check

Dealing with anger

It is totally normal to feel angry sometimes. We all get angry because we are human beings – it would be strange if we didn’t! So remember, anger is not a ‘bad’ emotion – it is a signal that something is not right. 

Anger is a defensive emotion. It tells us someone or something has made us feel unsafe, under attack, jealous, disrespected, or unloved. Anger sends us into fight or flight mode to keep us safe from the perceived ‘danger’ we are in. 

This can be positive when it motivates us to create positive change. But most often, feeling anger can be a sign that you need a little bit of extra love, care and support. 

Signs that anger is becoming a problem for you include: 

  • feeling angry all the time 
  • very small things making you very angry 
  • hitting or physically hurting other people or yourself
  • shouting a lot or constantly arguing with other people
  • breaking stuff or throwing things
  • feeling angry at yourself and being too self-critical 

If you’re feeling angry it is important to be aware of your behaviour so that you can identify your patterns. Do you show your anger by: 

  • Acting aggressively (shouting, hitting, arguing). 
  • Turning your anger inwards on yourself (hurting ourselves on purpose, not eating properly, deliberately not getting enough sleep etc). [hyperlink to the self-harm blog]
  • Act ‘passive aggressively’ – for example by refusing to speak to someone, being sarcastic, not answering calls, or deliberately doing a bad job when asked to do something. 

Here are 8 things you can do when you’re feeling angry: 

  1. Walk away – deal with the situation when you’ve had time to cool down 
  2. Distract yourself – do something completely different to get your mind off things for a while to help you reset your mood 
  3. Write down your feelings – grab a pen or laptop and write down everything you are feeling, and don’t stop until you have let it all out, then throw it away or delete it. 
  4. Exercise – go for a run, do some yoga at home, get the tension out of your body 
  5. Breathing exercises – take long, slow, deep breaths
  6. Take a shower – changing your body’s temperature and engaging different senses can change your mood 
  7. Think rationally – put your anger into context and think about different perspectives you could have on the situation
  8. Talk to someone you trust – call a friend or someone who cares about you and tell them how you feel and what is happening – it can really help to feel better

These are of course just short-term ways of dealing with intense emotions. If you struggle with anger regularly, it is important to get some more help and support, and to look deeper at what might be causing you to feel this way. 

Why do some people struggle so much with anger?


The way you were raised plays a big role in how you handle anger. If you’ve always seen people around you behaving a certain way, you might automatically react in the same way. We often model the behaviour of our parents – whether it is good or bad. If you have never seen people deal with anger in healthy ways, you might not know how to process your anger in a positive way.

Unhealed trauma 

Sometimes you can think you’re angry about one thing, but your anger is really being caused by something bigger. If something traumatic happened to you in the past, you might still be carrying that feeling of injustice with you and small things might trigger the pain of this past experience. It could be feelings of abandonment, rejection, loneliness, unworthiness or something else- but deep past pain can often show up in our present moment in unexpected ways. 

Suppressed feelings 

For example, your brother always leaving the kitchen messy might trigger your anger in the moment, but deep down, you’re really upset because you don’t feel like he spends quality time with you any more. Digging beneath the surface helps you find the real issues behind your anger, so that you can talk about your feelings in a calm way that helps other people understand.


Feeling like everyone else has power over your life can be infuriating. It’s frustrating, but the anger you’re feeling can be a good thing if it’s expressed in the right way. Lots of people find that activism and campaigning is a healthy outlet for their anger. Whether it’s joining up with a local action group or raising your voice for a cause you’re passionate about, there are plenty of ways to turn that anger into positive change.

Resource that can help: 



How to process anger and rage

How to reframe a challenging moment

How not to take things personally  

How to deal with difficult people 

Why we get mad – and why it’s healthy 



Dealing with difficult emotions 

Control anger before it controls you

Strategies for controlling anger

11 Anger management tips

Meditation for anger 


Is it time for a social media cleanse?

Social media can be a blessing and a curse, which is why so many of us have a love-hate relationship with social media. 

When used positively it can make us feel connected and less alone, inspired, and motivated. We can use it to learn about ourselves and the world. It can be an incredible professional networking and development tool, as well as the perfect way to build your own personal brand. 

But social media can also negatively affect our sleep, general mood, and self-esteem. It can give us anxiety, fear of missing out, and feelings of constant pressure to look good, always be available, and share our lives with others even when we’d rather not. 

How can we maximize the positives and avoid the negatives?

The first step is to think about what our behaviour patterns are and then figure out what impact these habits are having on our mental well-being. 

Take a moment to answer the following four questions:

  1. How often do you use social media?
  2. Which three words best describe how social media makes you feel?
  • Entertained 
  • Bored 
  • Inspired 
  • Jealous 
  • Happy 
  • Angry 
  • Optimistic 
  • Pessimistic 
  • Depressed 
  • Relieved 
  • Anxious 
  • Excited 
  • Connected 
  • Fulfilled 
  • Lonely 
  • Knowledgeable
  1. When and why does using social media make you feel this way? 
  2. How often do you compare your life to the people you follow online? 

It’s possible that you have a really positive and healthy relationship with social media – and that’s amazing! Or you might have spotted a few things that could be better – most of us are in this boat! 

So now you’ve analysed what your online life looks like, let’s think about what small changes we can make for a more positive time!

Try these 10 things and see if they make a difference: 

  1. Find and follow accounts that inspire and teach you – ask your friends for recommendations too 
  2. Mute, unfollow or block anything that makes you feel bad about yourself – and remember, you don’t need to justify your decisions to anyone! You decide what does and doesn’t feel good to you.  
  3. Avoid checking social media first thing in the morning when you wake up – what you see can influence your entire day ahead
  4. Give yourself a daily time limit and stick to it – set app timers on your phone to reduce the chance of getting swept into endless, mindless scrolling! 
  5. Set yourself small but meaningful goals – for example, to learn one interesting fact a day about a topic that interests you
  6. Take a proper social media break – try deleting all your social media apps for a week, or a few days, and see how it makes you feel
  7. Mute words, phrases, or topics that you know upset or trigger you – you can unmute these later if you need to 
  8. Reach out to someone you haven’t said hello to in a while and let them know you’re thinking of them!
  9. Share things that uplift and inspire you to spread positivity to your circle – and be mindful that if your accounts are public colleagues and employers will see what you post
  10. Avoid checking your phone an hour before bed – the blue light from your screen can interfere with your natural sleep hormones, disrupting the quality of your sleep

We hope these tips help you feel more positive and healthy – especially when spending extra time using social media to support your career growth and development! 

Self-harm – a hidden problem

Self-harm is something that is rarely talked about in almost all societies. But it happens in all cultures, and societies, all over the world. Self-harm affects people from all walks of life: successful athletes, top-performing CEOs, office workers, academics, popstars, and politicians… And it is happening in our community, so we need to talk about it. 


Self-harm is when a person intentionally hurts themselves to cope with difficult emotions. Sometimes these injuries can result in permanent scars, infections, broken bones, or other long-term pain/difficulties. 


Sometimes self-harm is easy to recognize: cuts and burns etc. But sometimes it can take the form of over-exercising to the point of injury, restricting food intake (and other disordered eating patterns), putting yourself in deliberately risky/dangerous situations, and punching walls.   


Often what stops people from speaking about their experiences is a sense of shame and guilt. If this is something you have experienced, or are currently experiencing, you are not alone and things can get better. You might be surprised to learn how common this behavior is. 

It is important to remember that self-harm only ever provides temporary relief, and it can become an addictive behavior. But the good thing is, there are things you can do to change this pattern of behavior and start feeling better. You won’t always feel like this. 


If you want to find out how to overcome self-harm or support someone who might be self-harming, here are some helpful resources with more information and advice: 


What are boundaries and why do you need them?

Do you say ‘yes’ to things because you’re worried about upsetting other people? Do you keep your opinions to yourself in case people disagree with you? Do you find yourself constantly worrying about others and spending too much time and energy trying to fix other people’s problems? In your efforts to be a kind and helpful person, you could be harming yourself in the process. Did you know that always pleasing others instead of yourself can lead to poor mental health, depression, and even physical illness?


Boundaries are the limits we place on what we decide to be acceptable or comfortable behaviors in our interactions with others. When we set a boundary we make a conscious choice about what we feel goes beyond being treated with due respect, care, and consideration. Setting boundaries for ourselves is a way to make sure people treat us with at least the same level of respect and kindness that we treat them. 


Whether in the workplace or in your personal life, it is healthy to be able to say ‘no’ with confidence when you feel like someone is asking too much from you, without fear, shame or guilt. But if this is something you are not used to doing it can feel scary and wrong. Often when we struggle with standing up for ourselves it comes from a deep-rooted fear (which starts in childhood) of being disliked, rejected, or abandoned. These feelings are totally normal, and they can be overcome. 

Importantly, having boundaries also means honoring other people’s boundaries. Someone else might have different ideas about what is and is not acceptable for them. Learning to respect people’s sense of dignity and self-determination is crucial, as well as being open to having a sensitive but honest dialogue when the people you are working with do not match your expectations about how you should treat each other.  


Find out more about how to start creating and implementing better boundaries in your life with these helpful resources: 


How to Juggle Work, Family and Relationships!

Life is beautiful. But it is also confusing, complicated, and messy. The people we live with, the people we work with, and the people we love, can make life feel exciting and joyful, but they can also be frustrating, sensitive, difficult, and upsetting. It’s normal to find juggling lots of different types of relationships exhausting!


It is clear that the quality of our lives seriously depends on the quality of our relationships. But unless we studied psychology, most of us go through life never being taught the secret science of developing healthy, unproblematic relationships! We are not born knowing how to handle conflicts with all the different personality types. And we might have a hard time figuring out why we have a person – or why they make us so angry too! But don’t worry – whether friendships, marriages, relationships with our children or parents, or colleagues – every tricky relationship can be fixed. 

Take a moment to reflect on the relationships in your life that are going well, and think about what makes these relationships so strong. Is there anything that could make it even better? Now think about any relationships with people that feel difficult. What role do you play in these relationships? What do you think could be improved and why?


It is ok if you don’t have the answers. The first step is simply acknowledging how you feel, and accepting when something needs changing or could be better. The good news is there are many free resources online that can help you explore your behavior and interactions with others to help you become more successful in all the areas of life you would like to improve. 

We pulled together a list of helpful places to start:

Work better with colleagues


Relationships with family and friends 

Romantic relationships/marriage

Parenting advice and tips  

Are you really looking after yourself?

You are fantastic, talented, and kind! And you know it is your duty to look after others and treat people generously and sensitively. That is your superpower!

But are you treating yourself with the same love, care, and attention that you give to others? For many of us, the answer to that question is often no. And that’s because sometimes what we want and need can feel like our lowest priority – because we’re bored, busy, stressed, or feeling tired and low energy.

You and your well-being are always worth investing in – especially when life feels difficult! Self-care is not selfish. Remember can look after other people much better when you are feeling good about yourself. As the saying goes: you cannot pour from an empty cup. So make sure you take the time you need to recharge.

It is important to realize that emotions happen in the body. This means our mood is affected by what our body experiences and how we treat it. Nourishing our bodies properly means thinking about all of our senses and making sure we attend to each of them properly. 

Take a moment to ask yourself the questions on this list that apply to you:

  1. Are you feeling clean and fresh (as much as possible in your circumstances)?

  2. Are you eating a balanced diet and staying hydrated (as much as possible in your circumstances)?

  3. Are you consuming too much caffeine – or any other kind of drug/stimulant? Adding too much to your system can have a bigger impact on your mood and energy levels than you might realize.

  4. Can you make your environment any more comfortable, or more cosy? Try reorganizing your stuff. Perhaps add your favorite color with a new cushion or poster? If you can, remove/hide/sell any objects that have negative memories attached to them.

  5. Do you have a favorite scent? It could be flowers on a tree, or the scent of breakfast, or a favorite perfume. Think about how you can stimulate your sense of smell.

  6. Is the music you listen to happy or sad? Does it inspire you to feel depressed or heartbroken? Or does it make you feel optimistic and energized? We absorb messages subconsciously, so try to listen to things that empower you. 
  7. Have you stretched recently? Are you exercising regularly? Going for a walk, dancing to your favorite song, or a quick at-home YouTube workout all count! Getting your body moving is crucial for your mental and physical well-being.

  8. Are you laughing much these days? Have you tried watching something light-hearted, or listening to a funny podcast? You deserve to laugh every day – even in the toughest times! Give yourself permission to have fun.

  9. Are you getting the mental stimulation you need? You could watch a video about a topic that interests you, start a hobby, learn a craft… This is especially important if you are looking for work not sure how to fill your time.

  10. Choose your friendships wisely. Spending time with people who are motivated and reflect qualities you admire is a form of self-care. You don’t have to give all your time to people who do not value you – it’s ok to say no to things you don’t want to do, and to people who do not respect your qualities and life goals.

For more tips and advice check out these helpful resources:

Working through Grief

The pain and suffering that comes with loss cannot be underestimated. It can feel like our world has shattered, but somehow we have to keep moving forward whether we want to or not. And for many of us, working through grief is a reality we must face at some point. 

It is important to acknowledge that when we lose someone, or something, beloved to us, our feelings can be very complicated. And we all grieve in different ways. Mixed in with sadness we might experience: 

  • Anger 
  • Despair 
  • Relief 
  • Guilt 
  • Shame 
  • Numbness/nothing 
  • Exhaustion 
  • Frustration
  • Depression 
  • Anxiety 
  • Fear 
  • Confusion
  • Disbelief 
  • Emptiness 

You might feel like people or society, have expectations around how you should feel and behave after experiencing loss. But however, your feelings and reactions are normal and valid. There is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to grieve. 

Some people find focusing on work to be a helpful distraction. While for others it can create feelings of guilt that they are ‘moving on’ with their life, which can be hard to deal with. While there is no cure for a broken heart, there are things we can do that can help ease the pain. 

  • Make time for quiet reflection or meditation – you can even schedule it into your week. When things are busy, it might feel comforting knowing that you have a space planned that is just for you. Use this time to check in with yourself about how you are feeling and what small actions you can take to look after yourself in this difficult time.
  • Find some rituals that help you. It could be praying, going to a special/meaningful place once in a while, or doing something that brings back a good memory. 
  • Write a letter to your lost loved ones. Find a quiet moment to write all the things you wished you had said, all your honest thoughts and feelings too. This is not for anyone else to read, but a chance for you to express yourself and explore your feelings.
  • Talk about your feelings with someone you trust – people who care about you will want to support you. 
  • Do things that bring you joy. You are allowed to feel good. Give yourself permission to laugh and appreciate happy moments. It might feel strange or difficult, but it is possible to experience positive emotions even in the middle of grief if you can, find healthy distractions – books, podcasts, TV – anything that lifts your spirits and takes you away from the day-to-day for a few moments.
  • If you can access professional support then it is worth considering – especially if you are feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope. This could be a qualified online therapist, counselor, life coach, or psychiatrist.

Here are some helpful resources with more advice and tips for dealing with a bereavement: